In the beginning my parents had to drag me to the appointments. I was so emotionally turned off and unable to communicate what was going on that even sitting there felt uncomfortable. During those conversation we would uncover what the root of my fear was, but it was the discovery process of who Rebekka was as a human being that became the center of it all. Up until that point, I had just flowed through life. Swimming at that point was my entire identity, and I had no clue about who I was or what made me happy. I even had a difficult time answering why I was swimming. I came to discover that I am a highly sensitive person, which means my senses and nervous system are overly active and I process emotions, thoughts, impressions etc. on a deeper level than a neurotypical brain. Though this is a gift, I at that time felt a lot of pain, because I was bottling up all my emotions and turning them all towards myself.